| if i could take a ll my desires, wait out the weather that hides in my brain |
[28 Aug 2006|07:29am] |
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I am full of joy this morning. My friend from grade school who moved away in 8th grade is coming to visit me on saturday. Weve kept in touch lieghtwieght, but this is like the first time ive kicked it with her in about 2 1/2 years, let alone talked to her over the phone. I dig reconnected past. Its pretty chill. Now another coffee/cig presented day in the lif of Zac. Oh also, yesterday was awesome, I went to these sickledges near west berkely bart, and then to this hUGE graph wharehouse, and got ups with scrap cans, then went to the flea market and bought a clean ass jacket and bootleg Clerks 2. Things are on the up and up. WOOHOOO!!!
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| tonight may have to last me all my life |
[26 Aug 2006|10:23pm] |
Im incredibly alone. All my peers are either drunk or in love. And I cannot be either of those things.
blah blah blah. whine whine whine. sarcastic anecdote.
i keep falling into the past, wanting things i once had, watching old clips from my longgone video camera. I want to wake up next to someone that loves me. I want to dissapear. I want to breathe smoke.
but more than all that, I really want to be happy again. its been a really long time, and its starting to wear on me.
"Like the Red Panda"
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| i go where i please |
[23 Aug 2006|07:35am] |
Hooray.Its my first day of school! Im on the block like i missed the bus...
and fuck super mario7-3.
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| yo. |
[21 Aug 2006|09:50am] |
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whats really good?
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| im simple man really.i like pretty things. |
[18 Aug 2006|10:01am] |
| [ |
mood |
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 bouncy |
] |
Yesterday was productive, got all set with school, got some clothes, skated with peter, and talked about sfState. No one answered my phone, so i went to Jack's. Me Julian Jack and Erin all went to Snakes on the plane, it was pretty crazy and then the reel broke,so the gave us some passes. Im dying my hair black. Then I dunno. Im going to coffee with Aimee, cause shes got some new dude to tell me about and I gotta tell her about the last month, and she goin out of town every weekend for the next month. Then, I dont know, maybe someone will fucking call me this afternoon. If not Ima skate, then see whats crackin
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| And the sense is, your disconnected |
[17 Aug 2006|07:34am] |
Today hopefully will outdo yesterday.
hope is four letter word
im just gonna start yelling hope, instead of fuck. that ought to wierd my mom out.
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| im in line to see the light |
[16 Aug 2006|03:25pm] |
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AND im about to have a an anuerism. My dad just called and yelled at me and said that im just as fucked up as before and told reference to my sister doing better than me. And I forget all that Ive learned and im spiraling into depression again. And I want to get out of here and no ones answering their phone. And I want something better.
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| a healthy distrust |
[19 Jul 2006|10:40am] |
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When hemmingway splattered his brains against the wall, that was style.
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| insomnia... |
[17 Jul 2006|12:21am] |
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isnt just a robin williams thriller.
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| bah |
[16 Jul 2006|09:57pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 cig time |
] |
Today seemed to just roll on taking hours for minor events to surface. I ended up just sitting at my house for the last 8 or so hours. The book is very good, i love short stories. Its hot! I suppose Ima be up for a while, heat always makes me tired but then i cant sleep. Its like waving cigarettes in front of my face and being like "no!, you cant have any". Kinda bummed. Kinda bored. Call me tommorow.kthnksbye
mazzy star.
this is my five string serenade
beneath the water of clay
and while i'm playing for you
it could be raining there too
and on my easile i drew
while I was thinking of you
and on the roof of my head
in came my five string serenade
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| and also |
[16 Jul 2006|04:03pm] |
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my moms making a good ass dinner, which makes me happy.
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| this is my five string serenade |
[16 Jul 2006|02:31pm] |
So i finally got the day, and that day is wednesday, and I hope I really transcend this thing. I met a girl the other night, Natalie, she's good. I bought a book today, How we are Hungry by Eggers, it's good.
If youre my mother, my lover, my sister, brother or friend, I wanna wish ya a good day.
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| rehab |
[11 Jul 2006|01:05pm] |
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28days.peaceout.
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| j/k now things are ten times as gay |
[04 Jul 2006|11:08am] |
18 monthes informal probabtion. no liscense for one year. if im ever caught drunk or with alcohol I go to jail for 3 months minimum. my dad flaked on me saying thati should just live in the city of screw ups,Alameda Cali.
I am moving home to live in the garage. I haveto renounce my old friends in the meda due to chronic alcoholism. Work and take a full load to make myself exhausted. Ive been to avid bout my acid trip.
Thinking bout that club card.
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| im moving |
[02 Jul 2006|08:48pm] |
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to live with my dad in texas. I need to live in a structured enviroment in order to suceed. im over drinking and smoking. i want to be a healthy person. school, work, and a healthy lifestyle. I want to start saving money to open my own sandwich place in Berkeley. bye.
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fail_completely's journal